clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

2019 B.C. - A Dystopian Fiction

New, comments

What if Burnergate never happened? What if Bryan Colangelo had never stepped down? In this alternate timeline, he is still the GM heading into the 2019 offseason. Join me as I take you on an entirely graphic journey through the worst offseason in Sixers history.

...I felt it was time to reset...

...I felt it was time to reset...

Those words rattled through my head incessantly, never ceasing or even momentarily ceding to another thought. I’d become obsessed, I suppose. Who could have blamed me?

The icy September air beat against my office window as I peered through the bottom pane at the desolate landscape beyond. I hoped to see a neighbor walking past, or anyone for that matter. Not a soul. I could hear the faint crackling of fire in the distance, but nothing more. It’s as though the summer had left a permanent stain on my neighborhood—and the city of Philadelphia as a whole.

How did we get here? Where was there to go now that we were here?

...I felt it was time to reset...

Those words again. I’m sure by now you’re wondering what happened. As I write this, I’m finding it increasingly more difficult to articulate the events of this past summer in a rational manner. I’ve come up with an alternative.

Rather than tell you, I think it’d be best I show you.

Below, I have included every tweet, article headline, YouTube thumbnail, and cultural epitaph that I saved to my phone and laptop throughout the summer in chronological order. When put together, these images tell an unadulterated account of the worst summer in Sixers history.

[Please proceed with caution. What you find will likely shock you]