Ichiro Suzuki’s well-publicized chase of the all-time hit king came to a head this summer, when the Marlins hitter was asked about Pete Rose’s attitude toward his accomplishments. Ichiro summed up his thoughts like so:
I was actually happy to see the Hit King get defensive. I kind of felt I was accepted. I heard that about five years ago Pete Rose did an interview, and he said that he wished that I could break that record. Obviously, this time around it was a different vibe. In the 16 years that I have been here, what I’ve noticed is that in America, when people feel like a person is below them, not just in numbers but in general, they will kind of talk you up. But then when you get up to the same level or maybe even higher, they get in attack mode; they are maybe not as supportive. I kind of felt that this time.
This provides us with some background on why The Ringer might have released this hilarious mockumentary short on Joel Embiid:
.@JoelEmbiid's rookie year with the @Sixers is going to be legendary.
— The Ringer (@ringer) September 14, 2016
At least, that’s what he's been telling us: pic.twitter.com/4uB4kpBL91
For the last three years, the Sixers have been a doormat in the view of other fans, who have used the franchise as a whipping boy to make themselves feel better about the shortcomings of their own team. With Embiid’s arrival imminent alongside other incoming talent, it only makes sense to get the jokes off while they still can.
It’s a rough time for many of the participants in this video. Jonothan Tjarks’ Mavericks paid a premium to acquire the two worst members of the Warriors starting lineup to supplement an aging Dirk Nowitzki. Shea Serrano’s Spurs lost one of the 10 greatest players of all time to retirement, and replaced him with Pau Gasol, who defends the pick-and-roll as well as I do at this point.
Jason Conception’s Knicks spent the offseason dealing for players who peaked in 2010, including this guy:
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And we can’t leave out ringleader Bill Simmons, the famous Celtics diehard who already lost his son to Sixers fandom:
Good call little man!
Jokes aside, this was a really well done parody of the typical “comeback story” style documentary, and got quite a few laughs out of me. But if and when Embiid is dunking on Kristaps Porzingis, Al Horford and the like, The Ringer staff should know that Sixers fans are coming for them.