Are your family and friends getting sick of the Sam Hinkie ping pong shirt and threatening to divorce/disown you for cutting the sleeves off and practicing your 2018 Sixers Championship flex? We have the solution! A new, more embarrassing shirt for this year's Lottery Party! Who needs a family when you have ALL THESE NAMES???
BUY IT FOR PICKUP AT LOTTERY PARTY FOR $15: here.
BUY IT FOR SHIPPING TO YOU FOR $20: here.
That is, without fail, every person to call themselves a Sixer -- even for a second! -- since Sam Hinkie ascended to the throne in 2013. All of them are important. All of them matter. We would not be THE PROCESS if we failed to acknowledge all the faceless names who got us here. By here I mean like, in a few years, when they're good.
There were previously errors on the shirt, but those have been fixed in the above image, and will definitely be fixed before the shirts get printed. I'm not gonna throw anybody under the bus about the mistakes. I know writing that sentence sort of indicates a throwing under the bus itself -- look, I'm not gonna tell you what to read into or what to think. Just know, I, Michael Levin, will certainly not be throwing anybody under any bus of any kind.
Big thanks to our people at Cheesesteak Tees!
COMMENCE PHASE TWO.
BUY THE SHIRT. LISTEN TO THE RICKY BELOW. COME TO THE LOTTERY PARTY:
When: May 17th, 6pm-10pm
Where: XFinity Live, Philadelphia
How Much: Free (Parking Free With This Ticket)
The 2016 Lottery Party will be at XFinity Live in South Philly. It will be Tuesday, May 17th, from 6pm until 10pm. It will be free to get inside. There will be a LIVE Ricky with good audio, we promise. It will benefit (in part) The Alzheimer’s Association of the Delaware Valley, and RAINN. There will be giveaways, including a HUGE one from our very own LL Pavorsky Jewelers (as well as many, many smaller ones!).
Please come. It will be the end of our suffering. That sounds more culty than I meant it to, but at this point, who cares? You just bought a t-shirt with Solomon Alabi's name on it. See you at the Lottery Party.