Sixers Beat The Cavs Without LeBron Or Kyrie Or Anybody Really But Shhh A Home Win!

LeBron James: Out. Kyrie Irving: Out. Dion Waiters: Traded. Tanner Steidel/Matt Carey/Mike Levin/Derek Bodner/Rich Hoffman/Spike Eskin: IN. Advantage: SIXERS.

It was a magical night at the Wells Fargo Center. The Sixers hadn't been home since before the Disney On Ice road trip way back in the winter of 2014. And they sure did take advantage of some home-cooked CAVS.

There was a three play stretch when JaKarr Sampson was the best player on the court. MCW was (shooting aside! cherrypicking is okay in a win!) a stud. KJ McDaniels had two alley-oops! Look at those fellows throwing good lobs! Henry Sims hit shots because Hank Sims is a shot-hitting machine. Bob Covington did the damn thing (petition to call him "The Pedestrian" because he always has the right of way? and also nobody really knew who he was before all this? I'm gonna call him that.). Not Nerlens's best game but he had his moments like BLOCKS and HOOK SHOTS and GOOFY PASSES. I also definitively like Jerami Grant.

okay but really it's all about:

TONY. GODDAMN. WROTEN. He went right a few times! Finished with his right hand once! Wouldn't believe it if Tanner, Matt, and I weren't pinching each other's nipples as it happened right in front of us. And then that game-winner. Just TRY and stop this dude.

All leading up to the last stop when Matthew Dellavedova (LOLOLOL) got bumped pretty good by MCW on the miss as the swallowed whistles went unblown.

Derek will have more in the morning -- and we could talk about this game for years, we may need to -- but allow me to exaggerate a few things before I come down from this buzz. This was the best game of the season. This was the best game of all time. The crowd was on fire. The team was on fire. Furkan Aldemir had 10 rebounds and took no shots -- it was all perfect. We needed this one and we got it.

5 wins never felt so good. Wroten forever.

*Even though the Sixers won, this game will henceforth be known as The Joe Harris Game. Box score tells me he had 16 -- I was there, no way it was less than 40.*