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Did you know people from Utah consume more Jell-O per capita than any other state in the union? With that in mind, we turn our attention to the Utah Jazz. The Jazz are perfect. I wouldn't change a thing about them. I'd almost condone forfeiting the pick entirely as a gesture of goodwill for the immaculate players already on the team.
"Hey there, Rodney Hood. Instead of Devin Booker, we got you this fruit basket and some caramels.
We didn't tell Trevor Booker about the caramels."
That's not to say the Jazz are as well-placed to become title contenders as Basketball Twitter seems to believe. Snyder is a nice coach, but this team -- while not short on perfection, is very light on top-flight talent. Rudy Gobert will eventually need to learn a move before he becomes Mecha Olajuwon-Ewing-Robespierre. Derrick Favors is good, but probably not much more than good. Gordon Hayward and Alec Burks are signed for an awfully long time, and not for cheap -- although the salary cap increases will diminish that. Trey Burke may be the worst player in the league. And as delightful as Dante Exum is, last year was dogshit-adjacent for him.
On the other hand, they've got draft picks out the wazzoo, and a playoff appearance this year could do some of the legwork in attracting a bigger free agent or two next offseason when the cap expands. So we at Jazz HQ are in the market for some Win Now moves (*trademarked, Doug Collins*). That's why I said in last week's Ricky that I expect Utah (and Phoenix behind them) to be canvassing the market for veteranness (LRMAM, perchance?), if not using this pick and a package of others to try to move up.
BUT. This is the Liberty Ballers NBA Mock Draft. And trading picks for veterans is not an option, lest Roy Silver Burton lose his damn mind trying to wrangle us all. So I, Sir Jazz Levine, am tasked with reaching into the draft pool and extracting a player to help right away.
Oh, Frank. I feel a bit Basic Fan suggesting that Utah in 2015 would still draft a white dude, but Kaminsky has been a Jazzman since birth. Born in a small town outside Naperville, Illinois (the Provo of the Midwest, maybe), Frank stayed in Big Ten Country to ready himself for his 20s in Salt Lake.
But more to the point, he provides the outside shooting and passing ability to immediately and perfectly compliment the Favors-Gobert frontcourt. His weaknesses defending the perimeter will be bailed out by those same long-armed men on the inside. He's not going to be asked to do more than he should, and if the Michael Jordans don't bite on him earlier, his basically hometown Jazz are the dream fit. At age 22, he's already the oldest player on the team. He'll help our Jazz sneak into the '16 postseason and should look right at home celebrating next to Dante in the locker room come April.
Welcome, Frank. Jell-O's in the fridge.
LIBERTY BALLERS 2015 MOCK DRAFT
Minnesota Timberwolves - Karl-Anthony Towns
Los Angeles Lakers - Jahlil Okafor
Philadelphia 76ers - D'Angelo Russell
New York Knicks - Emmanuel Mudiay
Orlando Magic - Mario Hezonja
Sacramento Kings - Justise Winslow
Denver Nuggets - Willie Cauley-Stein
Detroit Pistons - Stanley Johnson
Charlotte Hornets - Kristaps Porzingis
Miami Heat - Myles Turner
Indiana Pacers - Cameron Payne
Utah Jazz - Frank Kaminsky
Phoenix Suns - ?????