Sixers. Sharpie.— Seth Davis (@SethDavisHoops) March 30, 2014
Today is a good day.
You can't stop this team. They'll probably win the rest of their games this year.— John Gonzalez (@gonzoCSN) March 30, 2014
Easy now, slugger.
Two weeks back, Liberty Ballers received a press release from sports hypnotist Todd Stofka that explained how he could help break the Sixers' losing streak:
"The Philadelphia 76ers set a franchise record by losing their 21st consecutive game when they fell to the Pacers 99-90 in Indiana on Monday [March 17]," says Todd Stofka, Sports Hypnotist. Sports Performance Psychology teaches that we all learn via repetition and 21 straight losses is a lot of game time wiring the mindset of being a losing team.
If he thought losing 21 games was bad, I can only imagine how he felt after the 76ers ripped off 26 in a row.
(Editor's Note: How does one become a sports hypnotist? I never saw that in the undergraduate bulletin when I was at Temple. Is this a correspondence course like the ones Sally Struthers used to hawk back in the day? Can I study this as well as TV/VCR repair and accounting from the comfort of my own home?)
The Sixers need to break this trance. When Stofka has worked with basketball teams using basketball hypnosis in this situation there are two things that need to be done:
1. Free up the individual players so they can have fun and play good ball.
2. Reunite the team to play as one by getting rid of the blame.
Not sure if either of these apply here. I'm fairly certain that the Sixers are free to do pretty much whatever they want (within reason). The problem is that the things that they are capable of doing don't amount to wins on most nights. And by "most nights", I mean "virtually every night."
Basketball Sports Hypnosis can easily turn around the NBA Philadelphia 76ers along with any College or High School Team.
Maybe... but can hypnosis prevent Byron Mullens from looking like a serial killer who will smother me with a pillow while I sleep? HIGHLY UNLIKELY.
This has absolutely nothing to do with our favorite basketball team - I just appreciate the fact that multi-millionaire athletes
waste spend their money on the same types of trivial things I would if I were rich.
Man... this picture is evidence that it's been a LONG time since the Sixers won an NBA title.
For starters, there is no Waldorf-Astoria in the city of Philadelphia these days (I'm pretty sure it's the Bellevue now, but don't quote me on that). Secondly, the last T-top Firebird rolled off of the assembly line in 2002. And that Sport Magazine logo on the side of the car? Yeah... they ceased printing back in August 2000.
Look at how out of place Big Mo looks in that Firebird. I'm pretty sure this is what it looks like when Shaq tries to fit inside of his Buick convertible.
So the pistons are gonna be THAT team?— Damien Wilkins (@dwilkins3000) March 30, 2014
You know... we wouldn't be in this position had you not played your little heart out at the end of last season, Damien. But then again, we probably wouldn't have had MCW and Noel and the Pelicans' 1st-round pick, either. So... thanks, Damien! Tell 'Nique I said hello. #PassionateIntenseProud
Throwback ... and I mean Throwback Thursday. I was 2 in this photo. pic.twitter.com/FQ8Mm9EwNm— Keith Pompey (@PompeyOnSixers) March 27, 2014
I was going to make a "The Last Time The Sixers Won, This Was In Style" joke, but that wouldn't be entirely accurate. This was never in style.
There is a tight historic correlation between poorly run franchises&top draft picks that generally does not go away once you make a top pick— Daryl Morey (@dmorey) March 28, 2014
However, when well run franchises get the number one asset in the NBA, a top 5 player in the draft on a rookie scale contract, watch out— Daryl Morey (@dmorey) March 28, 2014
Not to mention the value of a well run franchise getting multiple top draft picks on rookie scale contracts— Daryl Morey (@dmorey) March 28, 2014
Love you, Daryl Morey.
my man..... SWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGY P! yikers pic.twitter.com/lkvRdqFVRR— Artie Del Campo (@ArtieDelCampo) March 26, 2014
Missing you, Nick.