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What's In A Nickname? The 76ers May Soon Find Out

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The NBA's push to put nicknames on the back of jerseys would result in an increase in merchandising revenue for approximately 29 of the league's teams. And then there's the Sixers.

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According to the Associated Press, the NBA is considering a proposal where members of the Miami Heat and the Brooklyn Nets would sport nicknames on the back of their jerseys during a regular season game this year. And by "considering", we mean "the league has already asked each player for the name that they'd like on their jersey, and the uniforms are being printed as you read this."

A number of basketball purists have already voiced their displeasure with the idea, and it's clear that the move is little more than a blatant money grab. That said, it would be kind of cool to see "Jesus Shuttlesworth" on the back of Ray Allen's jersey (and +1 to the league if they actually allow "AK-47" to be stitched on the back of Andrei Kirilenko's uniform).

For now, the Heat and Nets are the only teams participating in the experiment, but what if our beloved Philadelphia 76ers were able to sport nicknames on the back of their jerseys? Some suggestions:

Evan Turner: The Villain
Lavoy Allen: Chef Voyardee
Spencer Hawes: Wight Howard
Arnett Moultrie: Moultrie Hill
Michael Carter-Williams: MCW / MC-Dub
Thaddeus Young: Available For The Right Offer
Tim Olbrecht: Hello... My Name Is Tim Olbrecht
James Anderson: This Space Is Reserved For Andrew Wiggins
Nerlens Noel: The Fresh Prince of South Philly / Boo Boo
Jason Richardson: Yes, I'm Still On The Team
Royce White: Mr. 500
Kwame Brown: DNP-CD

And, while we're at it, some former Sixers as well...

Jrue Holiday: Jrue The Damaja / Jrue Hill
Jodie Meeks: Meek Mill
Lou Williams: Lou Will
Nick Young: Swaggy P
Nik Vucevic: #ShouldOfKept
Charles Jenkins: #ShouldNotOfKept
Andrew Bynum: The Big Lebowski
Nick Wolters: I Was On The Team For About 10 Minutes On Draft Night
Damien Wilkins: The Man Who Doesn't Understand What Tanking Means