Sixers Sign Jeremy Pargo to 10-Day Contract Because Of Course They Did

The Sixers played the Cavaliers in November when Kyrie Irving was hurt. A scrappy Gonzagan guard started in his place and torched the Sixers "defense" for 28 points on 11-19 shooting for a 92-83 Cleveland victory. They may as well have offered Jeremy Pargo a max contract right then and there. They didn't, but in the most obvious move in the history of obvious moves, they've signed him to a 10-day contract after letting Shelvin Mack's second 10-day lapse.

SHELLLLVINNNNNNNNNNNN!

People in Philadelphia are literally over the moon about J-Pargs. Fake movie fake movie posters have already been made, I heard they're painting a billboard for him, and he's already been handed the key to Philadelphia and West Baltimore under the Carcetti ticket. We're hearing things about J.P. Batista and Derek Raivio nearing max contracts from the Sixers as well.

But all celebrations have a cost. And that cost is the 2 points and 1 assist in 7 minutes from the Little Shelvin That Could. He shot 1-2 for the Sixers. 50%!!! Man, what a cold, cold world. But I do have an announcement to make. Shelvin and I are ready to take this relationship to the next level. We've had discussions and he's going to take my name. But he's changing his first name as well because he is committed to this marriage. Shlevin Levin will always have a 10-day contract in my heart!

Of course they signed Pargo though. Of course they did. OF COURSE THEY DID. "YO REMEMBER THAT GUY WHO SCORED A BUNCH OF POINTS ON US THAT ONE TIME WHAT WAS HIS NAME WE SHOULD SIGN HIM YO SERIOUSLY BRING THAT DUDE IN HE'LL SCORE ALL THE POINTS EXCEPT FOR US THIS TIME YEAH THAT'LL WORK HERE WE GO!"

Welcome to the Sixers bench, Jeremy. You may have a seat next to Arnett.

"Again… PARGO? seriously?" - Soman, November 21st, 2012.