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Doug Collins Has Sixers Starting Lineup, Sensitive Kwame

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Ever since the Sixers reached deeeeep into the barrel to sign Kwame Brown, it's been reported by many that he'd be starting at center. The terror of that was enough to hump the hair off your nipples. Welp, get the St. Ives ready because The Fabulous Tom Moore has some more comments from Doug Collins. And here they are now!

I can bet we'll be seeing Evan Turner on the bench more often than when the ball is tipped next season. Thinking Dorell Wright will slide into the Jodie Meeks role as "Dude Who Keeps ET Out Of The Starting Lineup." With Andre Iguodala on the team still, it doesn't really matter where Evan plays anymore. Jordan thinks he'd be best in the BOSS role off the bench. Nick Young should get plenty of run off the bench too. I'm pretty ambivalent about it all.

Definitely going to write a ballad to the Kwame Brown and Spencer Hawes starting frontcourt. Who knows how long it'll last, but this should be a magical time for us all. We'll be making shirts. V-necks, probably.

First pass based on this.

PG: Jrue Holiday...Royal Ivey
SG: Evan Turner...Nick Young
SF: Andre Iguodala...Dorell Wright, Moe Harkless
PF: Spencer Hawes...Thaddeus Young, Arnett Moultrie
C: Kwame Brown...Lavoy Allen, Nikola Vucevic

Black out with me after the jump.

Good, because Hawes has defended exactly once at the power forward position in 2008-09 with the Kings. He's been seriously uncomfortable for 3-4 years now. Maybe it's jock itch. I just imagining Kwame lifting Hawes in the air. They're going to be the best of friends. Thump and Bump part deux.

Another gem from Tom:

First of all, I'd just like to say I love how the Sixers signed him because he knows the coaching staff. They also signed Aaron McKie's niece who once sang the National Anthem at an Erie Bayhawks game. She's a doll. Nice lateral footwork.

So Kwame is sensitive. I listen to Barry Manilow too, Kwame. Spencer is also pretty sensitive (hotel room beating), but nobody is more sensitive than Nikola Vucevic, who evidently is missing.

That's fantastic. Between Kwame, Vuce, and Spencer, there's a good chance we have the most sensitive three bigs in the league. If Darko's English was better, I think they'd bring him in for a cup.

Again, the Sixers think this team will be good. They think they have gotten better. Tanking by accident isn't a bad thing, but it does indicate a heavy dose of stupid from the brain trust. Let's see how this debacle shakes out.