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Free Throws! Sixers Sleepwalk Past Cavs 99-84

In what may have been the sleepiest game of the season thus far, the Spencer Hawes-less Sixers spiked the Cleveland Cavaliers minus Kyrie Irving and Anderson Varejao. The 76ers yawned their way to a 15 point second quarter win and never looked back. In fairness to the Cavs, they were without their two best players and are forced to play their home games in Cleveland. Bummer.

There were some good things and some bad touches tonight, as there always are, and I will outline them below, using as many incorrect usages of the word "Cavalier" as I possibly can in honor of Marc Zumoff and Malik Rose. Plow ahead.

Jrue Holiday finally relented to our constant urgings and found himself at the foul line a season-high 8 times on the night. This is good. The stats reflect it, with Jrue scoring 20 points (superstar) on just 13 shots and dishing out five assists to no turnovers. 9 of his 13 shots were taken within 10 feet of the basket, and it's amazing how much difference that makes. With a team-leading 35 minutes, Jrue cavaliered his way to his most efficient game of the season. Hopefully this continues.

The team took 30 foul shots tonight, one shy of their cavalier high. Three guys (Jrue, Louis Williams, Elton Brand) had over 7 FTs, the first time that's happened all season. They responded by making 23 of them, good for a 76.7% and the admiration of all fans everywhere. They should be better from the line, but as we said earlier today, it hasn't made much of a difference thus far. Free throws are just an easy, tangible stat to point to that "proves" why they won/lost a game. They're important, but extrapolated over the season so far, the issue is the lack of attempts, not the percentage of makes.

In other news, the team is still cavalier at not turning the ball over, Evan Turner is still outside pawing at his wet food and looking for his bone, the Night Shift outscored everyone, and Andre Iguodala took 5 shots (5 too many if you ask me, heh heh), blending into the general sleepwalkingness that was tonight's win. But a win's a win and there are a few other points with which I'd like to share.

  • Thaddeus Young leftied his way to a decent night. It's been a while, young T-Haddeus.
  • Mr. 500 Lavoy Allen started and Tony Battie'd his way to a rebounding-heavy, point-deprived night.
  • Boss was Bossy, how good of him, but he was efficient in knocking down WIDE OPEN looks that Boogie Gibson kept daring him to take. He's been absolutely phenomenal at not turning the ball over. I'm ticklingly impressed.
  • This is my first recap this year which has incorporated bullet points. Cash in your chips now, folks.
  • Nikola Vucevic hit four shots then got all handsy and tried himself a few long two's and awk-hooks. They didn't go over too well.
  • I don't know where Elton Brand's jump shot has gone, but if you see it anywhere, tell it I would like my letterman's jacket back and to give it to my mom next time it sees her at the hardware store. 31.7% shooting from 3-9 cavaliers this year. Yurgh.
  • Alonzo Gee is either Ricky Davis or a really good impersonator of Ricky Davis.
  • I don't think Christian Eyenga is a very nice guy. Malik Rose compared him to Luc Richard Mbah a Moute for obvious spelling and pronunciation reasons.
  • Semih Erden played like that guy in video games you put in because you see he's tall, then try to cover every ball handler with him only to find that he gets tired after putting his shorts on and starts to sweat profusely. Like that.
  • Oh yeah, Frozone came so close to playing. But then they realized he wasn't dressed so he had to sit out. Like, he was naked. Completely naked. Surprisingly, they let him watch the rest of the game from the bench without his clothes on.
  • Tristan Thompson was still a bad pick.
  • Samardo Samuels and Luke Harangody reminisced about their cavalier days at Louisville and Notre Dame. Boy, they had some good times.

Sorry for being so cavalier about this recap. Hope no Cavs fans are offended and that Kyrie Irving gets better soon. Your team is infinitely more watchable when Ramon Sessions and Daniel Gibson aren't sharing a backcourt. The Sixers traverse to Charlotte on Monday in search of their 20th win. Five of their six games before the All-Star Break are on the road, where they'll hopefully play some teams that matter that aren't missing any players/coaches/cheerleaders so they can finally put a signature win on their resume. Chicago, Atlanta (twice), LA (purples), Orlando, and Indiana notwithstanding, natch.

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