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Help Me Dongaila, You're My Only Hope

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Drastic times call for drastic measures. The Sixers, with their backs placed firmly and rigidly against the wall, have to go against the grain a bit in game four this afternoon if they want to live to see another day. Darius Songaila, colloquially known as "Dongaila" or "Dong" to his friends, hasn't played a minute this series. Whether or not that is some dastardly plan by Doug Collins to overthrow the Sixers is unknown to me. But what I do know is, LeBron James should be scared of Dongaila.

Each of Dong's last 10 playoff games have been against LeBron, when he was on Cleveland. Bron won the head-to-head matchups 8-2. Now that may not seem like a big deal to you, but if you know Dong like I know Dong, you know he doesn't take kindly to losing. And he texted James before the series started. I don't have access to these text messages but from a reliable and anonymous source, I can tell you that those texts were threatening in nature. Be aware that if Doug Collins does get off his moral high horse and play the man we need, this team will win Game Four, and quite possibly world domination.

"Have faith in the Dong." "Use the Dong, Luke." "He has been trained in the ways of the Dong." "You shall not Dong!"

Post your favorite Dong phrases below. Also, Happy Easter. Let's try to stay away from Jesus metaphors for any Sixers' resurrection in this series. We don't want a cosmic war on our hands in the game thread.