We're full steam ahead with the NBA Draft Lottery on Tuesday (come to our party!), but the Sixers magical season has not been forgotten. We still want to have some fun with those 28 ragamuffins and I'd like to commemorate them by creating the ALL 2013-14 SIXERS THE MOST SIXERS SO SIXERS team right here, right now.
- Must not have been drafted by the 76ers.
- Must have been included in a comment with "LOL", which actually excludes no one.
- That's it.
Point Guard: LORENZO BROWN
Brought up and down from the D-League like that chicken you keep defrosting and not getting around to making, Lorenzo played 224 magnificent minutes for the Sixers this year. Okay, maybe magnificent is a stretch, but dammit if Lorenzo wasn't my favorite rangy 6'5 point guard to shoot 30% from the field ever. You're with me forever, Zo.
Shooting Guard: JAMES ANDERSON
James Anderson led the Sixers in games played this season, which is perfect.— Michael Levin (@Michael_Levin) May 14, 2014
Small Forward: HOLLIS THOMPSON
I've had a Hollis Thompson story in drafts for a month. The delay is mainly due to my inability to find a hyperbole fitting for the best player of all time. Holli$$ went undrafted out of Georgetown and got scooped up out of the undrafteds by Sam Hinkie at the end of September. He would go on to be one of just six players to play for the Sixers all season long and lead all rookies in three-point shooting, at a 40.1% clip. Not to mention leading all eligible Sixers in true shooting percentage at .570.
He started 41 games and took less shots per 36 than fellas like Darius Morris and James Nunnally. Kid's the most unselfish person of all time, but he's not unathletic nor is he a liability at either end of the floor. He's 1000000% an NBA player, and I will riot if he doesn't get an All-Rookie nod. He was also the reason I almost didn't get credentialed for the Sixers/Clippers game, beautifully.
Love Love Love me my Hollis.
Power Forward: BRANDON DAVIES
Center: SPENCER HAWES
You're probably lamenting a spot for Dewayne Dedmon or Jarvis Varnado or Daniel Orton or maybe you don't know who those people are and you stumbled onto this website looking for Indian food in downtown Charlotte, but what you're getting is Spencer Hawes.
Wight Howard may have been traded at the deadline, but from games 1 to 82, there was no one who defined Sixerdom more than the big guy. I love him, I miss him, and if the Sixers sign him as a free agent this offseason, I will cough up all of my intestines from laughing so hard.
He's the very best, even when banging game-tying fadeaway one-legged threes from the corner against the Bucks in a meaningless game in November. My guy. He's my goddamn guy. Spread your wings and fly, Spencer.
Sixth Man: CASPER WARE
"who is that"
Signed purely as a joke for me circa 2011, Casper Ware brought his Long Beach State shorts to Philly in March and 10-Day Contract'd his way till the end of the year. There is no better indicator of how incredibly fun the rigmarole of 10-Day carousels became as the season wound down.
Casper Ware is not my favorite player of all time, but also, he is my favorite player of all time. The ultimate So Sixers.
Honorary Sixer: SCOTTY HOPSON
Scotty Hopson has never been with the Sixers in any way, but the Cavs signing him from Turkey to a 2-year, $3.8 million contract just so they can trade his contract to a team that wants to shed salary is the most Sixers thing I've ever heard. And for that, Scotty Hopson was a Sixer this season.
Sorry, MCW -- I'd go into battle with those six fine gentlemen (and Scotty!) every day of the week and twice on Sunday. Champions on paper? No. Champions in my heart? You're goddamn right.