76ers' Sunday Morning Shootaround: The Kevin Hart Edition

Bob Donnan-US PRESSWIRE

In this edition of the Sunday Morning Shootaround, Kevin Hart stops by 76ers' practice, Josh Harris nearly gives half of Philadelphia a heart attack, and one of our favorite swingmen finds himself in trouble with the law.

After the Sixers got everyone in a lather over their major announcement scheduled for last Thursday, it shockingly turned out to be rather anticlimatic.

The team (along with the New Jersey Devils) announced a multi-year partnership with PartyPoker.com that will result in the online gambling company being rammed down our collective throats every time we step into the Wells Fargo Center. And because Josh Harris has unlimited money, he paid Moses Malone, World B. Free and Allen Iverson to appear at the press conference, which was held at the Prudential Center.

In typical A.I. fashion, the former Sixers' guard wore his finest garments while surrounded by CEOs and other luminaries for a post-announcement photo op:

Never change, A.I. Haters: unwash ya brains.

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I... don't have words for this. Our very own Justin F. referred to it as the "First Circle of Tanking Hell", and that sounds about right. But how is it that they were able to run around the court without any problems, but Evan Turner couldn't get right in his Li-Nings?

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Props to the NBA for encouraging fitness among the youth of America, but they really need to do a better job of teaching their players to appear MODERATELY interested when interacting with the community.

Hollis Thompson clearly has no time to learn the fundamentals of squash - J.R. Smith looks more engaged when he's untying his opponents' shoes during free-throw attempts. Seriously though, I feel bad for the kids at the Lenfest Center when they heard that an NBA player was stopping by, and they had to settle for Thompson.

Semi-believable dialogue from last week:

"That's not Michael Carter-Williams, is it?"
"No, it's someone named Hollis Thompson. I thought they said NBA player... I've never heard of him."
"Didn't he use to play for the Eagles? He lost a lot of weight."

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Less than six months after he was honored with a "Remember This Guy" post courtesy of Dave Rueter, former Sixer (and current janitor) Richard Dumas was arrested for stealing various items from the Luke Air Force Base in Glendale, Arizona.

Dumas averaged just 1.3 steals per game during his three NBA seasons, but based on this video, the one-time Phoenix Sun has quicker hands than Michael Carter-Williams. It should be noted that the last time someone was caught so blatantly on tape stealing, he landed a date with Nia Long the following day.

Dumas (who clearly must not have known that he was videotaped) pled not guilty to the charges, and the statement on his official site would be hilarious if it wasn't sad. If only Richard hadn't dropped that trashcan on his foot on that fateful day in 1996... hopefully, John Lucas can call in some favors with a few of his lawyer friends.

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There aren't too many places where Ice Cube (government name: O'Shea Jackson) can go and not be the center of attention. But that's exactly what happened when he and Philly native Kevin Hart stopped by Sixers' practice on Thursday.

Missing from the picture above: Lorenzo Brown (who probably got sent to the Delaware 87ers three minutes before it was taken), Jason Richardson (who hasn't been seen in weeks) and Brandon Davies, because... Brandon Davies.

Your weekly dose of reality: Spencer Hawes (the Sixers' elder statesman with Jason Richardson on the shelf) was all of two weeks old when "Straight Outta Compton" was released.

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What cool things are those, Evan? Oh... you must mean THESE:

My bad - carry on, sir.

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