This happened a few days ago, but it took me some time to stop belly-laughing, wipe the tears from my eyes, wipe the dribbling stains down my leg, and sit down to write about Andrew Bynum not showing up for Sixers Picture Day.
It's perfect. It's absolutely 100% why-didn't-we-already-think-of-this perfect. I believe Bynum has taken more pictures while shopping than he has with the Sixers. That's the kind of production you want to see from your franchise player.
Reasons he didn't attend? Maybe he hates wearing the polo shirts his mom picked out for him. Maybe they weren't offering Maroon for his solo picture and he doesn't look good with a Grey background. Maybe his grandparents don't have any room left on their keychain for pictures. Maybe he was having a bad hair da-- WAIT A SECOND.
I love this story. I love it so much that I've been trying to get a copy of the Bynum-less Sixers team picture so I could look at it every night before I go to bed and when I wake up in the morning, but so far no luck. We'll always have this Kwame/Bynum picture. No one can ever take that from us.
It should be mentioned that Jason Richardson was also a no-show for the happy day because he's rehabbing, but that makes the narrative significantly less fun. So let's just pretend J-Rich doesn't exist, as most people already would have, had he not still be owed $13 mil over the next two years.
Even with three games left, the Sixers Gonna Sixers train keeps going strong. That's impressive commitment from them.