76ers Sunday Morning Shootaround: The List Edition

USA TODAY Sports

The Philadelphia 76ers haven't just been winning on the court recently - they've been winning off the court as well. All except for Kwame Brown, that is.


There aren't too many things that beat the feeling of watching your alma mater in the NCAA Tournament. Unfortunately for Sixers' PR director Michael Preston, that feeling only lasted about two hours or so. Conversely, a Wichita State team that has THIS MONSTROSITY as its mascot has won two games so far. I hope lunch was good, at least. #TEMPLEMADE

In all seriousness, NC State is a fine institution - they just couldn't hang with the finest institution in America. But things aren't all bad in Wolfpack land...

The Comprehensive List of Things That Are Good About NC State

  • Jim Valvano
  • They're the third-best university in North Carolina's famed "Research Triangle."
  • The fact that they kicked John Tesh out during his junior year.
  • Philip Rivers
  • They've stolen co-opted the nWo Wolfpack hand symbol. Because of this, the 1996 version of me probably would have applied to NC State had they changed their colors to black and white and played "Voodoo Chile" at all sporting events.
  • The Krispy Kreme Challenge: This is a fundraising event held every February in which students run 2.5 miles to a Krispy Kreme shop, eat 12 doughnuts and run the 2.5 miles back to campus in less than an hour. Fitness and gluttony both wrapped in a neat little 60-minute package... the New York City Marathon has nothing on this. Not gonna lie: When I first read about the Krispy Kreme Challenge, this was my reaction.
  • Zach Galifianakis

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Swaggy-burger_medium

Nick Young is from Los Angeles, so he's under the (incorrect) assumption that In-And-Out burgers are great, but they're really just average. This is a lot like the episode of The Office when Michael Scott gets excited about his trip to New York because it means that he can go to his favorite pizza shop: Sbarro's.

And since today is list day here on the SMS, here is...

The Definite Ranking Of Fast Food Cheeseburgers

1) Five Guys
2) Carl's Jr./Hardee's
3) Fatburger
4) In-And-Out
5) Sonic
6) Jack-In-The-Box
7) Burger King
8) Wendy's
9) Checkers
.
.
.
33) McDonald's

(Editor's Note: Both White Castle and Krystal were purposely omitted due to their unique burger sizes.)

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Swaggy-group_medium

A number of Sixers took a group photo while out in Cali, and by using the power of deduction, we were able to figure out exactly what was going through each of their minds the very second this picture was taken:

Dorell Wright: With this ridiculous shirt and smedium jacket, I might have out-swagged Swaggy tonight.
Royal Ivey: This Seattle Supersonics hat is CLEAN. It's also a cry for help: If you're seeing this picture and you're part of the group that wants to move the Kings to Seattle, please let me know - I'd love to play for you.
Arnett Moultrie: No matter where I am, there are always five guys ahead of me...
Swaggy P: Westside!
Jeremy Pargo: If this basketball thing doesn't work out, I can put this picture in my portfolio when I try out for a role on Supernatural next season.
Charles Jenkins: Nick is wearing all blue - is he a Crip? I don't think I've ever seen a Crip wear leather pants that tight...

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Kwame-dollar_medium

According to Kwame Brown, this is all he has left after Nick Young and Dorell Wright gave him the business during a card game during the flight out to Sacramento. Now would be the perfect time to go on a rant about Brown's excessive contract (that includes a player option for next year, no less), but since today is list day, here instead are a few of the comments left on the photo and the responses by Kwame Brown himself:

kidjames_23 You need to be putting up 50+ a game
kwan_low 50+??? My name not wilt chamberlain @kidjames_23 lol
kidjames_23 Ok maybe 30+?
kidjames_23 Kwame who was your favorite team to play for?
kwan_low Philly @kidjames_23
kidjames_23 Tell Andrew to get his a$ back lol
edgao42 Do you think everything you've been through in 12 years made you a stronger person?
kwan_low What is this doctor phil lol my God is your God bro never gave me anything I can't handle @edgao42
lauryn_hill_forever You're amazing! I got your autograph and that made my life!

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Woodson_medium

Mike Woodson isn't currently affiliated with the Philadelphia 76ers, but he was an assistant coach here for two seasons, so that's reason enough to go with this photo.

I can't even blame his wife for this - Mike Woodson is a grown ass man. He should know better than to walk out of the house looking like this. Nick Young wouldn't wear this. Trinidad James wouldn't wear this. Kwame The Boy Genius might have worn this back in 1990, but not in 2013. Yet a 55-year-old NBA head coach and leader of men thought that his was proper attire.

The Comprehensive List of Things That Mike Woodson Could Have Worn That Would Have Looked Better Than That Shirt

- ANYTHING ELSE THAT HE HAD IN HIS CLOSET

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