Sixers Day in the Lockout Life: Spencer Hawes

by Michael Levin on Jul 2, 2011 10:24 AM PDT in Sixers Non-News

The NBA Lockout has thrown a big fat wrench into the everyday lives of these normal, no-different-than-us millionaires. Luckily, I have exclusive access to the daily schedules of these Sixers players for the entirety of this No Basketball Association. I released the Marreese Speights schedule yesterday. Today, we'll look at the man starting in front of him, Spencer Hawes.

5:30 am - Rise and Grind.

5:35 am - Begin the intricate process of quaffing hair.

9:04 am - Settle for hair looking "just okay" and eat some Cracklin' Oat Bran

9:30 am - Be really Republican.

10:00 am - Do intense pool workout. Picture below.

More Spencer after the jump!

2:00 pm - Get out of the pool to see 6 missed calls from Tony Battie. Don't call him back.

2:45 pm - Play Call of Duty with Quincy Pondexter and Nate Robinson. Talk smack over the headset.

4:04 pm - Water plants. Pose.

6:30 pm - Make potroast. Give the leftovers to Ron Artest.

8:19 pm - Practice belly dancing. First put on customary Spanish belly dancing attire.

10:11 pm - Start to watch Mariners game.

10:17 pm - Fall asleep when Mariners go down 5-0 early.

Quite a schedule for Spencer! Hopefully he finds a time to play some basketball in there, otherwise Mr. 10-Year-Player himself (Nikola Vucevic according to our lame duck front office) will step into his starting spot.

UPDATE: From the man himself: "throw in actually working out and picking up an obscene amount of exploding airborne projectiles for the 4th. #america" - Spencer Hawes

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6:30 pm – Make potroast. Give the leftovers to ~~Ron Artest~~.

Don’t you mean Metta World Peace?

by KidGre on Jul 2, 2011 10:56 AM PDT reply actions

He filed a petition. Not official yet!

Liberty Ballers / Ridiculous Upside / Twitter

The Artist Formerly Known As The Artist Formerly Known As Michael Bourn

by Michael Levin on Jul 2, 2011 11:01 AM PDT up reply actions

who is that in the swimming pool with him?

by Aleemsay on Jul 2, 2011 11:23 AM PDT reply actions

The BOSS

by Nature on Jul 2, 2011 3:41 PM PDT up reply actions

His girl? Lookin’ like they got a bra on.

by Aleemsay on Jul 2, 2011 9:41 PM PDT up reply actions

It’s a “bro” or a “manzier”. :)

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, there will be no trade for Monta!

by dweebowitz on Jul 3, 2011 7:37 AM PDT up reply actions

I like that he acknowledged this via twitter.

"Miami can’t beat Chicago, why? Because Chicago has everything Miami has and more.... I’ll grant you Wade/James stealing a game, or maybe two. But we’re seeing an OKC/CHI finals, and that’s a finals everyone will tune in for." - LeQuan Glover

by yosoysean on Jul 2, 2011 12:13 PM PDT reply actions

Spence needs to acknowledge...

…that he plays better when he’s rockin’ the fresh-to-death Situation cut.

I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, there will be no trade for Monta!

by dweebowitz on Jul 2, 2011 1:02 PM PDT reply actions

Hawes should look into a guest host gig with Fox news during the lock-out. But it might be tough, because I doubt they are very “pro-union.”

by tk76 on Jul 2, 2011 6:13 PM PDT reply actions

by andyreidswaistline on Jul 3, 2011 12:11 PM PDT reply actions 2 recs

As a Kings fan...

I couldn’t be happier (still, a year later) that we rid ourselves of the NBA’s version of GW Bush. At the same time, I’ve got nothing but love for the Sixers and wish that you guys didn’t end up with him. I know that by the end of Sammy’s tenure, a lot of you couldn’t stand the sight of him, but even though he was pretty much a rental here in Sacramento, he has more passion in his ring finger than Hawes will have throughout his NBA career. The guy is the definition of BUST. No heart, no desire to get better, and an ego that surpasses his talent by light years.

Part of me wants to continue apologizing, but the other part can’t stop laughing at this post.

by J Ryan on Jul 3, 2011 11:28 PM PDT reply actions