Orlando Summer League Game 4 Preview: Sixers/Bobcats, With a Dash of LeBron

For the second time this week, the Sixers will wrap up action at the RDV Sportsplex with the late game. Only on this fine Thursday evening, a man our Latino friends call "El Rey" will be playing "Pick Your Contender" for all to see. If you haven't read this Adrian Wojnarowski Yahoo! column, stop what you are doing and read it, because it's fantastic. I'd be remiss failing to mention this, since this event, much to my chagrinnical chagrin, could be the widest-reported sports story of our time. Whatever your feelings, take a second to look around at how insane all of this is -- then remember NBA bloggers are taking over the world and go about your day.

More relevance after the jump, I promise.

Onto more important community-based events, there's a game to play and by gum somebody's gonna play it. As Jordan wrote in his recap last night, another meh-worthy game was logged by Evan Turner. If you feel like I'm repeating myself, it's because I am. Say it with me folks: Three Games of Summer League Basketball. For kicks and Wiggles, let's take a look at the only three things that mean less to me than how the Villain has performed thus far in Orlando.

1. How Chris Bosh's breakfast was.
2. The Snapple fact in my lunch ("The first sport to be filmed was boxing in 1894" -- ALREADY GOT THAT ONE LIKE THREE TIMES RAWR).
   
3. The Real Housewives of New Jersey.

And that's it. If you're having a cow, moose, or Cheshire cat and labeling Turner a bust after three Summer League games, I recommend you watch Martin Lawrence in Rebound until your eyes bleed - the results are more predictable with each viewing. Take a breath and enjoy these games so you can look back on this mediocre performance in June and laugh when ET's crowned Rookie of the Year. He's got stuff to work on, he knows it, and he'll come to play once it counts. I trust him with my life.

Only one matchup to highlight for today, and it's Gerald Henderson and Jodie Meeks. We'll see if they actually D each other up, or if McKie/Snyder put Turner on the Episcopal alumnus. Should these two 6'4 shooting guards get together, it will be sack-check time for Jodie. So far he's impressed mightily in the first three games, as he should, knocking down jumpers, running well in the open court, and stretching the defense for Jrue Holiday to slash, but his defensive assignments have been chocolate cake. Against the Nets he was on Ben Uzoh while Jrue tried to stick Terrence Williams, in the Celtics game he was on some combination of Rodney Green, Ryan Whitman, and Ryan Thompson. And yesterday he stood by the poor-shooting Robert Vaden for most of the game. Henderson is a different animal. He's got tremendous athleticism, a 6'10.25 wingspan, and legitimate NBA slashing ability. He barely played last year for Larry Brown's Bobcats but still has pro-level ability and should make noticeable strides his second season. If Meeks can do a solid job on Gerald Jr. defensively, he'll put himself in a position to get more than just off-the-bench-score-now minutes and gain some momentum heading into a team option year. Whether or not he's a part of this future will be determined by his ability to do things other than score the basketball. Step one starts today.

If you're unsure what to do until the Sixers game starts or until LeBron James' media-hogging, Cleveland-taunting, coverage-consuming, ego-inflating, cold beverage-drinking, ESPNWorldwide-Leading Special, follow these simple instructions word-for-word from our pal Seth at Posting and Toasting:

When the sun reaches its zenith, bring one crazy straw and one male adult goat (of any breed) to the nearest lake or pond. Slit the goat's throat and empty its blood into the lake. Remove the goat's horns and hooves (for ointment-making purposes). Using the crazy straw, drink the entire contents of the lake.

Thread to come later, kids.